This last month has probably been the most difficult month to be away from home and Daniel. Because it’s my last moth before I’m done my MA and go back to Winnipeg, you’d think (as did I) that it would be the easiest, and would fly by in a haze of newly engaged bliss. Boy, was I wrong. July started with a bang as it brought with it devastating news about close family friends that really affected both Daniel and I. Struggling to support him from afar as well as trying to sort through it while continuing to prepare for his transplant from a province away and finishing up my last course has been almost too much. As a result, my sleep schedule has become almost as messed up as my nursing friend’s and at its worst, I wasn’t falling asleep until 6am consistently, some days waking up two hours later to head off to class, coming home and collapsing, only to repeat night after night.
One thing I have found that helps is filling my head with something other than all the fear, sadness, hurt and confusion milling around up there. I do this by counting, not sheep, but velociraptors. I know sheep are more traditional, but really, what good does it do to count things that only mix with all the negativity rather than viciously destroy it? And that is what my velociraptors do. They rip, tear and feast on the things and people that won’t let me sleep until my head is filled with nothing but velociraptors. There truly is something soothing about imagining something that has given you nothing but grief suffering through a brutal and painful death by velociraptors.
Also, I love Daniel even more for turning my velociraptor counting into a Harry Potter reference by mentioning it as a way to practice occlumency. If anyone tries to break into my mind, all they will find is a slaughter of velociraptors (I don’t know what a group of velociraptors is called, but if a group of crows is called a murder, velociraptors deserve something just as, if not even more, awesome than that) ready to devour them.
Thanks for willingly venturing into my zany thoughts! I promise you won’t get eaten by a velociraptor….this time.